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User blog:GravityMan/MBOHS Season 3 Episode 3: The Three Wise Men vs Journey to the West
Welcome to the third battle of Season Three! Tonight we got the Biblical Magi, the Kings/Wise Men tasked to deliver goods to the newborn herald of their faith (Jesus) versus the three demons enlisted to deliver goods to the herald of their faith (Buddha), Sun Wu Kong, Pigsy, and Sandy. Love those guys. Love all these guys. Special thanks to Thy for the amazing, spectacular, cover and Bran for proof-reading. Let's go: Beat Starts at 0:28 Rapper Colors Caspar is red Balthazar is yellow Melichior is blue Sun Wu Kong is orange Sandy is green Pigsy is pink Together is white Lyrics The Three Wise Men: 0:28 Caspar look! Do you see the stars reigning over our foes? Why that’s us! Let us pack up and to victory we follow! I got the lessons I got the essence and I’m the one who slings gold, To put an end to these valets, ‘cause Herod has it foretold We shall be taking this beef; leave these beasts drooling It’s obvious this will be the first time they’ve had proper schooling (Weak!) And now you’re rolling with the Persian, riches from the rags I purchased, We men of peace bring no beef, your precious peach buns we’ll be servin’ You’re learning, not to try the Magi or you’ll find a delivery worth deservin’ Like the what happened to Wu Kong’s abandoned clan, we’ll leave these demons burnin’ Journey to the West: 0:57 Yo dudes what the fuck? We just gonna take these low blows? From the token Negro, the Unpronounceable, and the Friendly Ghost? I got my staff from the sea, you’re all in need of a deep probe, We drop martial law and martial arts! And strike with our qi flow I’m about to get up in your shit roughly, like my namesake, So deprived of flow, you probably salivate when Mary’s water breaks! For once your failure to deliver will be for the receiver’s betterment These three claim to be wise, but you’re thicker than the Testaments! You fuckers claim I don’t use my mind? Fine! I’ll be dishin’ out the pieces! We heard you knuckles like gifts, so you can suckle on my monkey peaches! The Three Wise Men: 1:23 Through the myriad of ages, I’ve swept through countless pages, Searching for the scent of foul deeds that will proceed to crush these sages And yes? West is Xi in Chinese, Alright, but so what? It may please you to know, that Xi also means suck! Ohh! We’re Latin Kings with satin things, you convicts are saddening, Chinese creations that lack knowledge? That fact is maddening! I’m quite sure they are nothing without the chimp Well let us find out! An ma ne ba mi our wangs and surrender in this bout! Journey to the West: 1:34 FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKK Sun Wu Kong clutches his head, the prayer causing his headband to tighten, sending him into a fetal position Keep it hanging King Kong, I’ve been meanin’ to spit some demons, Against these idiots who give their fortune to a baby on their first fuckin’ meetin’ Even combined my necklace has more balls than these Stooges, (ugh) You ditched your culture’s heritage because you weren’t cut to be Jewish Oooh! Spitting shade from the fig tree! It’s Pigsy! The bitches dig me! Busy! Sweeping beets with the rake, eating sweeties in one take, If you need me to teach these mortals their species must be diseased, for God’s sake! The Three Wise Men: 1:54 Whatever literary works to immerse the fact we came first, The earthshaker is nothing compared to the Savior’s birth! Animals in the desert without man are rendered dry and weak, Don’t use the Lord’s name in vain, use O! Ma! Gi! The number three, is the chosen degree of the holiest of deities While these Chinese remain unlucky, they’re four with the pony! These heathens got beaten by a vase, splayed maids, and a kid on roller skates Our Earth Flow will make you piss off in some other idol’s place! Journey to the West: 2:12 Alright, I’m back, my feet are about to reach their destination, Pigsy grab that little drummer boy before he receives their Adoration While I got the greatest question of them all for these three “Wise Men,” Yo how could Mary give birth if she never broke her hymen? It seems to me your lack of knowledge on the female body is a major downfall, Wasting away money on some cult They still have enough cash for salt! I got a thousand wives to attend to, so let’s finish this rap guys, We came hard, they brought surrender, Call it the Gift of the Magi! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! MYTHICAL RAP BATTLES OF HISTORICAL the logo is split in two, then repeatedly splits over and over SHIT ' ' Poll Who Won? The Three Magi Journey to the West Hint for Next Battle Category:Blog posts